I just finished reading about an exchange between the Dalai Lama and a waitress. His Holiness was approached during a luncheon and asked that all-too-ominous question: “What is the meaning of life?” He responded: “The meaning of life is happiness,” and quickly added: “Hard question is not, ‘What is meaning of life?’ That is easy question to answer! No, hard question is what make happiness.”
Indeed a powerful and well-intentioned message from the humblest of people, to which I must disagree. The meaning of life is not happiness. In believing this, you would have to assume that unhappy people have less meaning than happy people. I refuse to play society’s childish hierarchical game in prescribing one thing as more or less than another, in any regard. Not to mention that happiness seems quite subjective: While one person obtains happiness from the smile of an infant, another gets it from watching 43 identical cars make left turns all day on a “race track” where it’s so loud you can’t even hear the guy next to you obnoxiously spitting his tobacco into one of several empty beer cans. Is one type of happiness better than the other, or more accurate, or truer? Doubtful.
It might interest you to know that the waitresses’ response to His statement was “Thank you. Thank you,” upon which she finished stacking the table’s dishes and carrying them away. I assert to you that if happiness was truly the meaning of life, and the waitress truly believed this, that she would have karate-chopped the shit out of those dirty dishes and stormed off to pursue the things in life that made her the most happy. But of course, she did not. Rather, after hearing this statement of apparent enlightenment, she continued her (presumably) unhappy position as a dish carrier. I believe actions do speak louder than words, and that this example supports the idea that meaning is not derived from happiness. So what is the meaning of life? Lucky for you, I have the answer, and it just so happens that it comes in three easy-to-follow steps: Live. Wonder. Die.
Live. As with many great epiphanies, the first step is found in plain sight, within the question itself: what is the meaning of life? It’s to live. Shocking. Whatever you think living is, that’s what it is! All you gotta do is keep breathing and you’re doing great (I bet you thought this was gonna be hard). Physics and psychology, especially, strongly support the idea of reality being what we make it. This is not a fluffy phrase to make you feel better about your shitty life, this is mother-fucking science. Everything you experience is there because you think you experience it, and the meaning of life is no different. So if you think life is about happiness and fulfillment, then that’s what it is and you should pursue those things, or don’t pursue them, whatever you want to think. If you think it’s about killing bunnies, then catapult those furry fuckers into a wall. If you think it’s about rejecting what life is about and being completely miserable, then you’re still living your own little reality, aren’t you? And guess what: it’s no different than anybody else’s. This is inescapable.
Wonder. There’s what I like to call true reality, and then there’s the mind’s interpretation of that reality through our senses (in which we place all our trust). It is with this realization that we can understand true reality’s most identifiable goal: self-awareness. Egotistical Mother Nature apparently wants to look upon itself in awe at its own creation, and we facilitate this for Her (poorly, but we’re getting better). This is indeed understood through evolutionary theory: learning! What is learning? I posit it is the transition from our mind’s reality to a truer reality, and that a full understanding of true reality is the ultimate self-awareness project. So, step two in the meaning of life is simply: don’t not think!
Die. I like this one because it’s going to be easy – the last step in life’s meaning: just fuckin’ die already! Without death, there is no life, and if someone asked “What’s the meaning of life?” you would look at them like they just catapulted a bunny into a wall. This is because without death, you couldn’t compare life to anything and people wouldn’t know what the hell you were talking about. Opposites and their relationships create cycles, and cycles are everywhere – historical cycles, solar cycles, consciousness cycles – Life and Death are just another one of these cycles, and my advice is to accept and embrace cycles because they own and control you on a scale that we won’t be grasping anytime soon. So, basically, if you’re not headed towards death, you’re not doing life right. But don’t worry, I’m pretty sure you’re gonna die :).
Living, thinking and dying – you do not control the existence of any of these. That is the point! You think Nature would put us in charge of that? Ha! Yeah fuckin’ right… at least not yet, and for good reason (Nature isn’t that dumb). You have no free will in these matters, and truly realizing that will set you free. Just think: all you gotta do is sit back and enjoy the ride – whatever you want to do is perfectly fine. Nature will take care of itself, and ultimately you as well.
Thus, I must confess that I do not disagree with the Dalai Lama, nor did I ever. The meaning of life is happiness, but it’s also misery, and love, and indifference, and freedom, and imprisonment and everything that life is… what else could it be?! Indeed, it is not the question of the meaning of life that is difficult to answer, but rather the answer that is difficult to deal with. So please, don’t change a thing… or change everything! Or better yet, change some bits and leave other bits alone. One thing I can say for certain is that you’ll never change what your life means, because it means whatever it is whenever it is it. So, to borrow a lyrical phrase: Let’s just fuck and drink and be alive, not just survive!